My constellation

The legend of Douglas the Great Shark Wrangler is a traditional belief long held by many people. Douglas had his humble beginnings as a fisherman in the Mediterranean Sea. He worked for long hours, but it paid well enough to support his simple, mustached life. Yet he could sense that something was missing from this life. The fear of dying a simple fisherman kept him awake late at night. When he looked in the mirror he saw a mustached man destined for greatness. He was determined to seize the opportunity to become something more when it was presented to him.

The opportunity came, as many do, on a stormy day at sea. Brutal hail tore the sails of the fishing vessel to shreds, leaving Douglas and his three companions stranded in shark-infested waters. Where most men would see only the opportunity to be torn to shreds by massive shark jaws, Douglas saw his opportunity to become legendary. Using the belts of his companions to create shark harnesses, extra rope from the ship to make his reins, and a bucket for his chariot, Douglas boldly jumped into the deathtrap awaiting him in the ocean. With only his bare hands and sheer manliness he was able to harness two of the sharks and sail towards the stormy horizon, triumphant.

His beltless companions tried to find this shark-drawn chariot for months, but to no avail. Rumor has it that Douglas eventually became bored of this mustached lifestyle, sailing the open seas behind his two carnivorous friends. With no manlier accomplishment left to fulfill on this earth, he trained the sharks to fly and set off for another world. You can now see his constellation sailing across the night sky, hoping to one day meet Orion and his hunting dogs in an epic duel.